Listening to our bodies, not always easy, but always right!

A friend wanted to get together for breakfast recently. I asked her if she knew of a good place that had tomato soup in the morning. 

It was easy to see that she was trying to think through what I had asked, had she missed something and was she going to respond in a way that would make me think she'd not been paying attention. And finally, a nano-second before I was to repeat myself she asked me "What?" and I laughed a little and said I was really in the mood for tomato soup and would like to have that for breakfast. 

The ensuing conversation basically boiled down to this:
She: Let's get breakfast food for breakfast.
Me: I'm in the mood for tomato soup for breakfast.
She: That doesn't seem like breakfast to me.
Me: You can get whatever you like.
She: I guess...

And I really and truly enjoyed that tomato soup. It was exactly what my body was craving and wanting and filled me up and warmed me up in a delightful way.  Pea soup is another breakfast food for me and I figure I can't be the only one if it's available during breakfast!

One thing I do find difficult and non-natural, is listening to my body and doing the basic things it wants me to do. NEEDS me to do!

• Sleep when I am tired...not if I am in the middle of the work day or have committed to something, but if 7p is when I need to hit the hay, then so be it!
• Eat the foods I am craving when I am craving them when I am TRULY craving them, not just wanting because of smell or advertised suggestion.
• Having 5 or 6 small meals instead of 2 or 3 big meals throughout the day
• Delaying my first meal for up to 5 hours after waking
• Running further than planned when the run is just going so well

That is just a quick, short list. There are more, to be sure.

Society, whatever that really means, wants to dictate how we do things from such an early age. The way we learn in school, the foods we eat and when, the amount of time sleeping that is 'standard', the bevy of day to day actions that we often conform to instead of listening to ourselves. Allowing our bodies to know what is best for us.  It's great to be an individual right until society wants you to be part of the larger, agreeable community that does things like everyone else.

Add to that the pressure we often put on ourselves as women and then layer on that the pressure we tend to add with each role and we sometimes become reactive robots instead of intentional individuals:
Wife
Mother
Employee
Congregant
Volunteer
Child of aging parents
Neighbor
Friend
Homeowner
Pet parent

The list goes on from there, but you get the idea. It is easy to say "Oh, I can't do X because I need to take care of Y" but the truth of the matter is, that when you do what is best for YOU that the trickle down effect is that you are able to be the best version of each layer/role in your life, too. 

I remember when my son had his third or fourth surgery, I was simply exhausted and asked if I could have a place to quietly sleep or could I go out to my car and sleep there. The woman was clearly surprised a parent would go to sleep while her child was having major surgery, but my being awake wasn't helping anyone and having an exhausted version of me to meet with the surgeon and be on top of the care of my child when he did come out hours later wasn't going to do anyone any favors. Once she put her eyes back in her head she offered me a convertible chair, like dads get in the L&D suites and I fell into a deep, restorative sleep with lights on, people talking and all manner of things going on around me because I knew sleep was what I needed and what my son was going to need me to have had. 

When someone says they have a motto in life they tend to say it singular. I have many mottos and one is from the airlines....PUT YOUR OWN MASK ON FIRST BEFORE ASSISTING OTHERS!
And yes, it is so important that it is in all caps. No matter how much we want to do for others, and I am a huge fan of being there in a very real and present way for others, losing the oxygen to my body, my soul, my very being is not going to benefit anyone but the mortician. I cannot continue to breathe in deeply if I am flying around without oxygen.  Which is not to say it is a natural thing, either. I have to remind myself of that and I've been preaching the 'Your own mask first' approach for coming on close to two decades and still it is not second nature. 

But it is worthy of deliberate, intentional thought and action. 

Take a few moments and think about those times you've taken yourself out of the first place in your priority list and now think about those times you did make yourself a priority. Once people let go of the guilt of prioritizing themselves in their own lives, they tend to share that they are so glad they did it. And I have yet to have someone tell me they regret making themselves a priority. 

So go on, put your mask on and prioritize yourself in your life...I'd love to hear how you felt after doing that!