Crabby cheesy goodness for breakfast? Yes, please!

More and more I am learning to trust myself to eat the foods my body wants to be fueled by and not worry about the convention of when in the day it is eaten or even things many would find to be odd combinations. If I am craving it, it is healthy, it is available and it is time to eat...then I'm having it!

This morning I took the last bit of crab meat I had on hand, mixed it with the Wildtree Dill Dip seasoning (go light, it can be very salty as a seasoning!), a hearty spoonful of prepared horseradish and some Mexican melting cheese. Heated it just until the cheese bubbled and put it on two cracklebreads and enjoyed the goodness sakes out of it!

The only cracklebreads I have found are gluten free and while I don't ascribe to that lifestyle, I will say these are awfully tasty and very low calorie. They are the one carb base for my food that I can eat without calculating if I am going over a non-running day carb limit and I appreciate that!  They also have a really wonderful crunch, so no toasting is required, another plus for me when I am on the road!

I had pulled out my beloved pickles at first, but realized I wasn't craving them with the crab today. I was wanting something that was more savory and the cracklebread hit the spot exactly right!

Another 'breakfast' favorite is fresh boiled shrimp with mashed avocado. I won't call it guacamole because I am truly just mashing the avocado with some sea salt and calling it a day. I consider pico a must item for it to be called guac!

Favorite non-traditional meal item for you is what?

Death and loss and wishing for a time machine

On an early, cold morning in late spring 1992 as I sat in my recliner nursing my newborn son while I faded in and out of sleep, I got a call that took my breath away and had the horrible honor to call mutual friends and let them know of the passing of friend’s husband. A friend with three very young children. A friend I’d known for years and I recall hoping that it was all just a terrible dream and that I’d awake and he’d be where he was meant to be, with his family and not in the morgue. And yet in the clear light of day, there was no nightmare to awaken from, it was simply the new reality. I had a new baby, was in the midst of packing up our home and moving 3000 miles away and the idea of driving or flying several states away for the funeral seemed insurmountable. But I’ve regretted not going so many times. Funerals are not for the dead, they are for the living and I wished I’d been there for my friend in a more present way.

In June 2004 I was awoken from a deep, deep sleep by the phone ringing. I knew no good news came at the hour shown on the clock and I can still hear myself saying OH NO! OH NO! NO NO NO! over and over and over and my husband bolted upright, sat silently next to me with his arms tightly around my collapsed body as I received the news of a drunk driver having run over my beloved uncle as he rode his brand new bicycle, a gift just the day prior, with his young son the day after Father’s Day on an otherwise beautiful and perfect June Monday in California. I again made the dreaded, needed calls. Then I coordinated all the travel for my mother to travel 6,000 miles roundtrip and was admonished by my father how wasteful and stupid it would be for me to travel back to attend the funeral. And I regret it almost daily.

Yesterday afternoon I received the heartbreaking news of the passing of my oldest friend’s oldest son.  

A beautiful, tall, funny and smart 20 year old at college. As I reached out again to mutual friends and shared this heartbreaking news, it occurred to me what an honor it is to be there for friends in their time of deepest needs. That being a friend isn’t about the fun and laughter that you share so much as it is the ability to be truly emotionally naked with another human being. To bare your soul, your innermost passions and fears, to connect in a way that you simply could not do with a stranger or even an acquaintance.  To have silence and togetherness be enough when you don’t have words. To feel that strong hug over the telephone when you are physically apart, but lovingly connected. Right now there are many hands to help, many arms to physically hug, meals flowing in, bodies filling space so that their home doesn’t feel the emptiness that will surely be there, to some degree, for the rest of their days. I’d made the decision not to fly out for the funeral, even knowing how deeply I regretted missing others.  

But I knew I would not have regret because I also knew by going later, when those geographically close had  gotten back to life and my friend and her family were going to still need emotional salve and someone who isn't living that pain in the first person way they are, to be there for them. And then an amazing change of plans meant I could both be there for them and attend the service.  It has been delayed until December, the week before Christmas.  

I won’t say I know what they are going through, because my heart can barely stand to think of the task that lies ahead of them, simply getting through each day for the rest of their lives without their child here on earth, but I’m humbled and honored to be there and help in any possible way.

And I can't think of anything I would not give for a time machine to go back and have this all be so very, very different. I'd go back many years, not just to last week, but that time machine would surely be making a stop on 11-17-2014. 

God be with those who have lost those they love, God be with those we love, God be with us.

Brrrrr, some ways to keep warm while running this winter

I recently ran a race that started in 20 degree weather and finished in 33 degree weather. Cold by the standards of most. Frigid and unbearable for me. I actually considered not running because of the extreme cold.

Knowing the forecast was so very cold and that I had not raced a half in those low temperatures previously, I found it to be kismet when a local running store posted on the Sunday prior to the race that they had new technology running wear on hand. It was a brand I do not normally buy and a fit I do not normally choose.

The thermal Mizuno long sleeve shirt, in a fabulous color called Caribbean Sea, and the full length pants in black, were just what I needed. They get warmer as you sweat and do not wick it away leaving you cool as my other running gear is designed to do.  I was quite cold at the start line, we corralled an hour prior to the start, they do not keep you warm until you sweat. Keep this in mind as you plan your pre and post race clothing.

I also bought an OmniHeat running jacket from Columbia. I was torn between it and the North Face competitor jacket. The reasons I went with Columbia, even though I swooned over the icy aqua color of the North Face jacket were the fact that it had a built in thumb slots that kept the jacket sleeve down and allowed my gloves to be extra warm without a gap. The trim fit so there was not a boxy silhouette or room for any cold air to get in. I also liked the slant of the pockets and the length, which went to the pelvis, but not too short or long for my tall frame. It does not have a hood and I have found that a balaclava or beanie is a better choice than a built in hood.

The pants were low rise, which is not my norm or what I am comfortable in my running pants. I like a true waist location for my running bottoms and so I was not sure about buying these. One thing about choosing a local running store is that they typically have more customer friendly return policies. The one I went to will take an item back even after it has been worn for store credit. Knowing that if I did not like the low-rise they would help me find another, higher waist pant was a huge selling point for me.

Because I believe deeply in ‘nothing new on race day’ I wore the shirt and pants on a 6 mile run a few days prior. While I was very aware of the low rise fit, I found I liked it and chose to keep the pants. I am going to buy another pair since this winter is forecast to be quite cold and I’ll be running consistently through the weather, but I will be warm!

The foods we enjoy in winter

I think you could feed my husband chicken pot pie, chili and grilled cheese sandwiches any time of year, but for me, that is fall and winter comfort food!

We have been thrilled to find that many of the local churches have chicken pot pie dinners or fundraisers from parishioners, so we do not have to make them at home but end up with homemade food!

Pumpkin is a wonderful food that I like and add to many dishes. Tomato soup, pasta sauce, muffins, cakes, drinks…even my morning coffee get pure pumpkin puree for a punch of flavor and fiber!  

Buying a low sugar muffin mix or a sugar free cake mix and adding a can of pumpkin and baking is an easy way to increase the fiber, expand the flavor and keep extra fat out. I am not against fat, I think it is a great thing, but I’d rather spread some butter on my muffin than swirl oil into my muffin. It’s all about the value of the calorie to me.  Sometimes I will put a handful of unsweetened coconut in or some trail mix or even bits of nuts I have on hand. Again, the value of the fat of the nut or coconut is something we’ll actually enjoy, so I don’t worry about putting those in.

Portioning is important to me. If you put a huge muffin in front of most people, they will eat the entire muffin. It feels wasteful to leave a bite or two or three behind and even though I subscribe to the ‘better to go to waste than go to waist’ approach, I don’t want to make things that are oversized and build waste in, as I mostly want to have all food be used, enjoyed and not end up in the trash. I went to the local dollar store and bought traditional cupcake pans and make my muffins in those. I can easily get 18 muffins out of one batch of mix that calls for only 10-12 to be made ‘mega muffin’ size. That normal size muffin is exactly the right amount!

Another thing I enjoy doing is adding at least one scoop of unflavored protein powder to the mix before baking, but depending on the muffin mix I will add flavor. So in a plain pumpkin muffin I might add two scoops of chocolate powder. A peanut butter and pumpkin will get two scoops of peanut cookie powder. Be creative, think of fun flavors but don’t get too crazy. Think about what you enjoy together and have that be a great guide.  I one time mixed pumpkin with mint cookie. Let’s just say that I didn’t feel terribly bad feeding those to the dogs. Awful would have been a huge improvement on those beautiful but horrid tasting muffins!

So, to what have you added pumpkin recently?

Running to the sound of myself

I listen to music on 90 out of 100 miles run. I sometimes choose to forgo music, but last night it was thrust upon me. I was out of town and packed everything I needed for my run except my headphones. And then I realized, I don’t NEED headphones, I just want them.

Not about to skip the run, I headed out sans music and a little pouty. And something delightful happened.

More conscious of the sound of my breathing, I realized I wasn’t pushing myself as hard in certain spots so I stepped it up, literally. I ran the best 5K I have ever run, actually. I had to stop and look at my watch and make sure I wasn’t missing something. It wasn’t like I cut 10 minutes off it or anything, for that you’d have heard me screaming with joy from every corner of the world. It was just under 2 minutes than my former best time, but still, that’s a huge change for me! 

I was far more aware of the runners around me. I was more aware of their breathing, the sounds of their footsteps in and around me. I found myself doing better matching the cadence of those that ran ahead of me and my cadence was one of the better I’ve had as well, too!

The sounds of squirrels rustling in the leaves, at least I told myself it was squirrels and not anything that slithers, the call of birds getting ready to roost for the night in their nests high above and the serene sounds of water over rocks in the stream along the path…people pay to go spend time in such places on vacation and here I was running by completely oblivious in the past and enjoying it tremendously without headphones to block that all out.

I noticed something else that I am going to do a better job of observing in the future. Most headphoned runners had grim or determined looks on their faces. Most without headphones were smiling, almost amused looking, even if they were running at a stellar pace. I think that the pleasure of nature infused the ‘hearing’ runners and the pre-recorded streaming that blocked out the natural stream kept the headphoned runners from gaining that extra joie de vivre.

My latest obsession and no, I am not pregnant

I realized recently that I was buying two jars of pickles a week. Every week. Even when on the road, I am buying pickles. I have three brands I like, all are HFCS free and have thick cut chips, I don’t have time for thin little slices. Vlasic Farmer, which has carrot and sweet peppers in the brine for an extra treat, Bubbie’s and Brooklyn Brine.  Bread and butter is the flavor I love most, but every once in a while I will get a hankering for a dill pickle. But bread and butter is my thing! The irony is that I grew up eating them on sourdough bread with LOTS of butter and even cheese and so in my mind, when I now eat the plain pickle, I can still ‘taste’ those other things in my mouth.  The mind is amazingly powerful!

Pickles are such a wonderful substitute for bread!  I make various salads such as tuna, crab, shrimp and chicken, and put a bit on each pickle. I will take some phenomenal Kite Hill almond cheese and put it on them instead of crackers. The brine is good for far more than just the initial pickles, so when I finish the contents, I will put in snow peas or cauliflower florets, more carrots and basically any ‘hard’ vegetable. I did try brining an avocado once. Let’s just say that I do not recommend that.

I think that the sweet, salty, briny, crunchy and cold all work together to really get a party going on in your mouth and that is highly satisfying. So even when I am eating 6 pickles, plain, as a mid-morning snack I am getting great satisfaction for just 30 calories. Cannot beat that!

What is your favorite treat that is unusual, perhaps consumed in quantities that are greater than the standard person would desire, or acts as a wonderful substitution for something else? I’d love to hear about it!