Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, or so I have
been told. But there was certainly a time when someone being a copycat was
annoying and far from flattering. As I have grown, and developed my own style
and way of doing things, I have become more and more comfortable in taking the
express train on so many decisions that friends have forged a path down first. Some
are delightful examples and others, dire warnings, but regardless, I benefit
from their experiences.
My beloved, and locally famous, super automatic cappuccino and
latte maker…lifted from my oldest, dearest friend.
The giant bottles of shampoo and conditioner with a pump in
my master bath…lifted from a dear friend I have been so fortunate to reconnect
with after a period of time we lost touch.
Barbequing a chicken to get the taste of the grill and then
finishing it inside a day or two later…taken from a friend who has a husband
that struggles with ‘cooking outside’.
Folding a set of sheets neatly inside a pillowcase so all
the pieces are there when needed….gosh, I don’t even remember, but I know that
someone showed me, I did not create that approach.
The things I take from my friends are all highly valued by
me. It might be the savings in time or effort, it might be the delightful
memory of using that item or experiencing that moment with them. The things I
take from my friends are not always things….but the emotions of forgiveness, of
caring, of being cared for and of being allowed to minister to them and in turn
be ministered to when we are in that deep, dark aching hour of need that seems
to stretch into days and weeks and months at time. But to a friend, it’s just
an hour of loving you through the ache, hurt, pain or loss. It is that person
who will let you be balled up in bed, unwashed hair and several day old pajamas
and soothing words telling you everything is going to be all right one day.
Though they don’t tell you which day. Just one day.
The things I take from my friends are the tools I put in my
own kit to be there for others, to gird up my own loins, to feel ready to
battle whatever comes my way….work, husband, leaky roof, truculent teen…the
been there done that from others I care about gives me the strength to go there
and do that. It’s not without a price. Sometimes it is I who has forged the way
for others. That I have been that great example or that dire warning. It’s far
more fun and rewarding to be the former, but somehow I feel my relationship
grow when it’s the latter, because we can commiserate and laugh and deeply bond
sharing stories of how we’ve overcome the challenges of our journeys in a way
that the big wins don’t quite possess.
The things I take from my friends, I endeavor to give back in
spades. I pray that I gave at least as well as I got, that I loved as much or
more than I was loved and that all the things I was looking for in life really
were not things, but the moments and minutes that bind us in that most amazing
and inextricable way…through heartstrings that stretch and pull, but never
break. Years may go without a word, but I’ll take them always in my heart.
That
is what I take more than anything else…where ever I go, however long it takes to get there...I take my friends.